- Gary Farnham
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- You vs. You
You vs. You
Getting in line behind yourself
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Now onto this week’s article:
As I mentioned in my previous post last week, I am currently engrossed in the excellent book Predictably Irrational by Daniel Ariely, a professor of Behavioral Economics at Duke University.
I was in a bit of a funk with reading. I read about two books a month this past year, one of them being 700+ pages (Reality Transurfing I-V by Vadim Zeland). But lately, I was having a hard time focusing when reading and found my mind wandering. I love to read and have never had this problem before, so I was concerned. The monkey mind turned on and had me considering fears that my attention span had dwindled and I had lost my ability to read long-form books.
Then, once I picked up this book, I realized I wasn't the problem... the books and the authors of the books I was reading simply didn't capture my attention. The great and powerful Naval Ravikant has a saying, "Read what you love until you love to read." Furthermore, once you love to read, you will naturally begin to expand the topics you read about simply because you have developed a love for reading. Some of the early books that I truly loved to read and that fostered my love for reading were the Freakonomics series by Stephen J. Dubner and Steven Levitt, Everybody Lies by Seth Stephens Davidowitz, and The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey... maybe it's just something to do with the name Stephen...
Anyway, my point is that these are the types of books that high school me loved to read and that fostered my love for reading. Thus, when I picked up Predictably Irrational, it fit the bill, squashed my fears, and reignited my love for reading.
All of this to say, I loved this book and wanted to share more snippets from it that resonated with me and I feel will strike a chord in you, leading to behavioral change that brings vitality and confidence to your life.
In the chapter entitled "The Fallacy of Supply and Demand," Daniel discusses goslings, or baby geese, who innately follow any moving warm body, assuming it is their mother. Even if it isn't, they just make the assumption and follow. Dan says there is evidence pointing to humans doing the same in many cases.
We see what family, friends, smart, successful, and captivating people are doing, blindly following, not taking a step back to realize whether this is truly for us.
He explains that habits, and even many of our life decisions, can be like coming across a restaurant with a long line (think Giacomo's or Mike's Pastry in the North End of Boston, Hattie B's in Nashville, or Red's Eats in Wiscasset), and automatically hopping in line, trusting and imagining that the line is worth it. We equate a long line with increased utility and hop in line ourselves to experience it.
This is called "herding" or "the assumption that something is good (or bad) based on other people's previous behavior, and our own actions follow suit."
I personally am a bit skeptical when I see a long line and think there is no way it's worth waiting (perhaps a testament to how much I value my time or my tendency to be a contrarian). So this didn't quite resonate with me... but Dan continues.
He states that there is another kind of herding, "self-herding," and believes this is an even better explanation for our habits and behaviors. Self-herding is the belief that something is good or bad based on our OWN previous behavior. Rather than seeing a line of other people, we see a line of past versions of ourselves wrapping around the corner. When we do things multiple times, we "get in line behind ourselves," and that becomes further evidence for why we should do it.
Another way to express this concept is by saying, "You are what you repeat."
Dan elaborates on this idea by explaining how many transitioned to drinking Starbucks coffee. Perhaps you were accustomed to having a homemade cup or getting coffee from Dunkin' Donuts, but then you're introduced to Starbucks. You walk in, and the wonderful smell of coffee beans hits you, creating a genuine coffee shop atmosphere. You notice that the prices are higher than what you typically spend on a cup, but you decide to give it a try, imagining that the quality will be worth it due to the environment Starbucks has cultivated.
The next time you crave coffee, you find yourself in line at Starbucks, and you think to yourself, "I've been there before, enjoyed myself and the coffee. This must be a good decision for me." So, you go again. Now there are two versions of yourself in line, reinforcing the belief that this is who you are and what you do. Eventually, the line wraps around the corner with past versions of yourself engaging in this behavior, and you become convinced that this is who you are and what you do, and you join the line once more.
We have a natural inclination to view ourselves as intelligent and rational, so we assume this must be a good decision. Before you know it, you've become a Starbucks coffee drinker. "You are what you repeat." Credit to Starbucks for cultivating this experience. They've captured you.
It's important to note that this is an objective observation. I'm not stating whether this specific example is “good” or “bad”. If you enjoy it and it enhances your experience, all power to you.
This is where being aware of self-herding and "getting in line behind yourself" can be highly beneficial.
The more you go to the gym, the more versions of yourself have been to the gym. The more you drink, the more past versions of you are in line at the bar. The more you read, the more past versions of you are sitting down with a book. The more time you spend around people you love, the more past versions of you are waiting in line at the airport, heading somewhere to be with them.
Just remember that the more past versions of yourself that have engaged in a particular behavior, the stronger the attachment to that behavior becomes as you have a conversation with yourself about whether to continue it.
Ensure that the places you frequent provide you with energy and contribute to the improvement of your mind and body, rather than indulging in things that you know are bad for you. Make sure they are contributing to the future version of yourself that you aspire to be and not leading you towards becoming someone you don't want to be.
Only you know this; I am not claiming to know what these behaviors are. I am simply encouraging you to cultivate awareness.
It's quite simple. With everything you do, ask yourself, "Do I want to be someone who engages in this activity?" If the answer is no, stop right then and there. Don't get in line behind yourself again. If the answer is yes, engage in self-herding as much as possible to further convince yourself of its value.
Will your future self thank you for doing X?
It's you vs. you
G